Having Good Boundaries

"Like a city whose walls are broken through is a person who lacks self-control." -Proverbs 25:28

Have you ever heard the term 'boundaries' before? The word may conjure up images of a fence or a wall, but the idea of boundaries has come up in recent years as it relates to our emotional and spiritual health and interactions with others. Drs. Cloud and Townsend have written a great book on the subject entitled Boundaries. Why are boundaries important?

Boundaries give order to our lives, and our world. If we didn't have them, our lives would be out of order. Imagine if you always stayed up late and got up early. You would always be exhausted. Your work would suffer, your relationships would suffer, and so would your health. Exercise habits, sleep schedules, dietary choices, time management, financial management, and relationships are all about good or poor boundaries. The Bible talks about boundaries. In the garden of Eden, God gave Adam and Eve both freedom and boundary. The Ten Commandments are a set of boundaries that God set up to help us be successful in life.

Perhaps the most elusive type of boundaries are the ones we need to have have with others. They may or may not make sense to us due to the way we were raised.

Recently a friend was sharing with me an experience she had had over the holiday between her and a family member of hers. This family member had said aloud that he did not like her music, (she is a musician), which was fine, but the statement came across as rude and belittling. She told him he was that he was entitled to his own opinion, but that she didn't appreciate the belittlement. He later apologized for his behavior.

The stronger we become in Christ, the stronger our boundaries become. But, this doesn't mean we shut people out. Conversely, we are in a better position to give and receive love. We are safe to be ourselves because we have set good boundaries in place in order to do so. As we realize more and more about God's nature and character we realize how He operates. He invites us to live within certain boundaries so that we can live a free and holy life, pleasing unto him, and a blessing to those we encounter.

Where are God's boundaries? What kind of boundaries should we have as His children? Make sure you are not a "city without walls" so that God can use you greatly for His kingdom.

Dealing with Betrayal

"So when Joseph came to his brothers, they stripped him of his robe - the ornate robe he was wearing- and they took him and threw him into the cistern." -Gen 37:23 & 24  

Have you ever had something happen to you that wasn't fair?  Have you ever been falsely accused or wrongly judged?  It is in these situations where our emotions can get the better of us.  But, we have to stand firm and "be the bigger person" in order to see the fulfillment of God's purposes in our lives.  

Joseph was betrayed by his brothers - he was betrayed by his own family! Isn't it interesting that the people who should have been his biggest advocates were his betrayers?  Joseph had to trust God. Even during his time in the Egyptian prison he had to remain pure and avoid becoming bitter. His obedience was what allowed him to rise, even in the midst of false accusations.  

When people do wrong to us, we must be the bigger person.  Even if the person should know better, if we feel ourselves getting angry or bitter, we must decide to be the bigger person.  Maybe someone has a limited understanding of something, even a leader.  Give them grace.  Maybe someone is acting out of fear and pain.  Give them space. It is a test we must undergo so that God's bigger purposes may be revealed in our lives.  

Have you ever been betrayed?  How did you respond?  Determine to forgive the person who wronged you.  Maintain an attitude of forgiveness.  Be the bigger person.  God works through vessels that let go of offenses and trust Him for the bigger plan. 



As It Is In Heaven

"And I will give you the keys of the Kingdom of Heaven. Whatever you forbid on earth will be forbidden in heaven, and whatever you permit on earth will be permitted in heaven." -Matthew 16:19
 
You know, God gave us quite an incredible gift when He sent His son Jesus to die for us.  In addition to this free gift of eternal salvation, He also gave us many keys that, when activated, can move mountains on our behalf.  All He said we needed to have was a mustard seed of faith, and to keep asking (Matt 17:20, 7:7).

Recently a friend was going through a really difficult situation.  Something had happened with her place of residence, and she was facing undue eviction!  Understandably, she was very upset.  I said, "You know what?  God doesn't want you to be evicted.  He wants you to have a place to live that is safe and secure.  So since that is His will for you, we should pray that His will be accomplished on earth as it is in heaven." (paraphrase)  So that is exactly what we prayed!

It took several days for a decision to be reached about her eviction, but thankfully, the landlords decided to let her stay!  After she discovered that the motion was halted against her, she told me and we prayed and thanked God for His moving on her behalf.

Is there anything in your life that needs to be, "on earth, as it is in heaven?"  Pray with firm belief that the things you are hoping for will be manifest on the earth.  God can do incredible things through us, if we will believe.

Giving God the Glory

"The land of Egypt will become a desolate wasteland, and the Egyptians will know that I am the Lord. "Because you said, 'The Nile River is mine; I made it.'" -Ezekiel 29:9

"I did that."
"I built that."
"Because I deserve it."

In our Western way of thinking, we often think that the reason for our success is just because of us, even if we believe in God.  The mindset that, "It happened because of me," pervades our society.  But, is this really true?

The Bible says, "Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows.” (James 1:17) Would we be able to have life without Him? 

The Psalmist knew the value of praising God.  "Praise the Lord! Praise God in his sanctuary; praise him in his mighty heaven! Praise him for his mighty works; praise his unequaled greatness!" Psalm 150:1-2 When we give God the glory in our lives, we put honor where honor is rightfully due.  

"So I gave you a land on which you did not toil and cities you did not build; and you live in them and eat from vineyards and olive groves that you did not plant." Joshua 24:13 When we receive an inheritance from God, it is often not by the work of our own hands.  It is simply because of our obedience and God's grace in our lives.

Is there anything you need to give God the glory for in your life?  Even if we think nothing good has happened in our lives of late, we can be grateful for another day, another breath, the sun, the sky, the trees, and most of all, an opportunity to let His love and light shine through us to the world.  He is worthy of all praise.

A New Heart

"And I will give you a new heart, and I will put a new spirit in you. I will take out your stony, stubborn heart and give you a tender, responsive heart. And I will put my Spirit in you so that you will follow my decrees and be careful to obey my regulations." Ezekiel 36:24-28

You know, when we begin to think about the New Year, there is a lot of talk about New Year’s Resolutions.  In 2007, Richard Wisemen from the University of Bristol did a survey of 3000 people to see how many actually fulfilled their New Year’s resolutions.  According to his findings, a staggering 88% of people do not fulfill their New Year’s resolutions.  What does that say about us?  I think it says that only 12% of us keep our promises to ourselves!

Right before the time of Jesus, Israel had been stuck in a cycle of idol worship. The prophet Ezekiel prophesied that the people of Israel would become brand new: “I will give you a new heart, and I will put a new spirit in you.”  Ezekiel prophesied the transforming power that Jesus would have in their lives.

Today, this hasn’t changed.  Jesus is changing lives & hearts all over the world, in every nation, in every kind of community!

Have you ever wanted a new heart, or a fresh start? If you want an authentic change in your life, and a new heart, why not ask Him to give you that today, even if you’ve already asked Him into your heart.  God is in the business of giving away new beginnings, because of His son Jesus who died, so that we might be live completely free and unfettered by our past.

Cast Your Cares on Him

"Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest." (Matthew 11:28 NLT)

You know, in this world we live in, it is easy to be stressed. There is so much to take care of, so many things that happen - it's amazing we get through some things.   The number of people taking anti-anxiety medication has skyrocketed in America.  According to USA Today, 1 in 5 people take behavioral medications.  Life transitions, illness, difficult family members - sometimes life seems like more than we can bear.

"...the times when you have seen only one set of footprints, is when I carried you." (Mary Stephenson)

I love the footsteps in the sand poem. When I was younger I found it cheesy, but its so true that during difficult times our Heavenly Father carries us, like He would a son or daughter, as we learn to "cast our cares on Him."

I've always imagined the first disciples as happy, exuberant people. From what we read about them, and in spite of much persecution, they seem to have been the most loving, joy-filled people on the planet.

Today we have almost every convenience we could wish for - and in America we can worship as we please without danger.  But with all the stuff and convenience we have, we are still the most stressed out.

Is there anything in your life you need to give to God today? He desires that we give our cares and burdens to Him, because He cares for us so much.

“Give your burdens to the LORD, and he will take care of you. He will not permit the godly to slip and fall.”  (Ps 55:22 NLT)  "Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you."  (1 Peter 5:7 NLT)

Our One True God

"But the LORD is the only true God. He is the living God and the everlasting King! The whole earth trembles at his anger. The nations cannot stand up to his wrath." -Jeremiah 10:10

From the time Israel was released from bondage to Egypt until the time of Jesus, the Israelites struggled with idolatry.  Even though they had been given a set of instructions by Moses (the 10 Commandments), they still rebelled against the guidelines God gave them and set out to live the way they wanted.  As such, they began to worship idols, starting with the golden calf, when Moses was on Mt. Sinai getting these instructions from God.  (Exodus 32)

We humans have always had the same nature, trying to fill the voids in our lives where God should be.  But, the fact of the matter is, God is our only hope.  He is our only TRUE God. And He loves us more than anyone or anything ever could in our entire lives. 

"For God loved the world so much that he gave his one and only Son, so that everyone who believes in him will not perish but have eternal life."  -John 3:16

Too often, we can find ourselves in a similar situation that Israel did.  If we’re not worshipping the one true God, we’re worshipping something.  We were designed for worship!

Is God the only true God in your life?  Ask Him today if there are any idols in your life that may need to be put aside.  Our lives function best when He becomes our one and only God.