The Gift in Singleness

“But I wish everyone were single, just as I am. Yet each person has a special gift from God, of one kind or another.” -1 Corinthians 7:7

Paul talks in 1 Corinthians about the question of whether it is better to be married or single. He expresses the idea that it’s okay to be married, but to not seek out a relationship if you’re single.  (1 Cor 7: 27)

I believe as a culture we’ve done a great disservice to people who are single.  Our churches are filled with families, and often the church can become a “meat market” for getting into relationship with someone.  We may feel pressured to be in a relationship in order to fit in.  We may fear being alone. But, the time when we’re single is in fact our greatest opportunity to serve God and develop a deeper relationship with Him.  (1 Cor 7:32-35) 

Many of us had family situations that were less than ideal growing up. We might have been given a blueprint to look for a dysfunctional mate as a result of our upbringing.  Or, we might still be looking to resolve issues of love, acceptance, and value by getting into relationship with other people, when we need to look to God for that unconditional love and acceptance.

What are some of the things you can do while you are single to prepare for God’s future blessings in your life?

• Set out to discover your personality, gifts and talents, and most of all your passion
• Find places to serve God, in your church and community - perhaps even abroad
• Further your skills by investing in training or education
• Develop kingdom relationships with people who have similar desires

Treasure the time you have while you are single.  It is a gift, just as much as being married is a gift.  When you honor God with everything you have and seek Him, He will honor you in that.  We find that when we delight ourselves in God, He will give us the desires of our heart.  (Ps 37:4)

Faultless Ministry

"We live in such a way that no one will stumble because of us, and no one will find fault with our ministry."  -2 Corinthians 6:3

Do you have a ministry?  The answer is yes!  Each of us are called to be ministers.  We are first called to someone (Jesus), and then we are called to represent His nature in the world. That is a huge responsibility, but not one to be scared of.  I heard ministry aptly described the other day: "being an ambassador of love and reconciliation." Isn't that awesome?  Once you and I are born again, anew in Christ, we are called to be ambassadors of love and reconciliation. 

But, what about all the stuff that goes on out there?  What about the bad rap Christians get for "standing up for the truth"; being judgmental, narrow minded, and hypocritical?  It is quite a battlefield, and it's true if we're going to represent Jesus accurately, we need to be cautious and accountable for how we live our lives.  I love the verse above - "We live in such a way that no one will stumble because of us, and no one will find fault with our ministry."

There are many examples of ministry gone wrong.  The sign on the street that says "God hates gays", financial distributions out of wack, stingy tips at a restaurant, and all around rude or difficult behavior.  Still, some confess to be Christians but live the same way as the world.  We as the body of Christ definitely have some work to do.

But all of this doesn't mean we don't continue to try.  God has given us the biggest responsibility on earth - to represent Him wherever we are.  That is a huge honor.  And it doesn't mean we're perfect, by any means.  But we understand that in our weakness, we are made strong - because of our dependence on His grace. 

Do you know that you are God's minister to a hurting world?  You could be the very person that brings hope into someone's life.  Seek after Jesus in all things.  Be an ambassador of love and reconciliation.  He will make your life count.

Unconditional Blessing, Unconditional Honor

“Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse.”  -Romans 12:14



If you’ve spent any time in Christian circles, you’ve likely heard a sermon preached on blessing our enemies and praying for those who curse us. (Luke 6:28) We talk about blessing as it relates to people who are different than us, aka, sinners, or the unrighteous.  But how often on a regular basis do we get to mingle with people who are COMPLETELY different than us, unless we started hanging out at bars, strip clubs, or mosques?  And, how often does someone who is more like us rub us the wrong way at church? How do we respond? Do we actually know how to bless someone we disagree with, like Jesus did?



Our culture is pretty different than Eastern Jewish culture was back then.  Our culture is very much based on a performance-mindset - that is, “If you do what I want, I’ll bless you.”  This idea comes through in our parenting styles, our management, and our pastoral care.  No doubt about it there is consequence for poor or bad behavior.  But, in the Jewish culture they understood that blessing was a given.  You bless the person because they are a human being, created by God.  You believe the best for them.  You pray for them.  As far as honor was concerned, they honored people because of the position they held, not because of good or bad behavior, (not to say they didn’t confront them.) (Matthew 18:15) But, in our culture, I think we have it backwards. We’re called to bless, not withhold blessing based on performance.  In reality, we should honor everyone, no matter who they are. 



True love isn’t love if it’s conditional - true love is very hard. When we are offended or hurt by something, we naturally shrink back in self-protection.  To be possible, unconditional blessing requires the cross - it requires Jesus.



Are you able to bless others unconditionally?  When someone hurts you, instead of putting walls up, try blessing them instead. This isn’t condoning out of order behavior - but a recognition of the person in spite of their behavior. Pray and ask God how He might have you bless someone today.

The Search for Significance

"Come and follow Me, and I will make you fishers of men." -Matthew 4:19  

Have you ever felt insignificant?  Have you ever felt like nothing you did would matter to anyone else?  Conversely, have you ever felt valued?  Like, what you did really mattered to someone in this world?   
 
If you ever ask a young person what they want to be when they grow up, they'll likely say something like, "An astronaut!" "A fireman!" "A ballerina!"  "A rockstar!" Even from an early age, we're searching for significance.  We're searching to do something "cool" that makes an impact on others.   
 
Unfortunately, so much of our American culture today focuses on who is in the spotlight.  We confuse the spotlight for significance.  But, once we've tasted what it means to truly make a difference, the rest of the "fluffy stuff" just doesn?t matter anymore.  What matters is that our lives mean something to others. I heard a pastor tell a story once about a few unnamed people who made a difference in his church. A small group of volunteers wanted to make a backdrop for their stage with the words "There is hope in Jesus".  A man walked in the next Sunday with his mind made up.  He had decided that that day was the day he was going to end his own life.  He thought to himself, "I am going to go to church one last time.  And then, I am going to go home and end it."
 
The man walked into their church and looked at the words on the backdrop.  As the story was told, he observed the worship, he listened to the preaching, but when he got home that day, ready to do whatever he was going to do, all that he could think of was those words, "There is hope in Jesus."  Those words inspired him not to take his life that day.
 
Are you focused on making a difference in someone's life, versus just searching for success?  Success finds us when we make it a point to bless someone else.  Blessing can be in the form of words, an action, or a smile.  Who can you bless today? 

The Prerequisites of God's Blessing

"But remember the Lord your God, for it is He who gives you the ability to produce wealth, and so confirms his covenant, which he swore to your ancestors, as it is today." -Deut 8:18

What do we have to do to receive God's blessing? Is God's blessing ensured for 'special' people? What does God's blessing look like, and how can we set ourselves up to receive His blessings?

 In Exodus and Deuteronomy, God describes a series of "do's" and "don'ts" that the Israelites are to follow. They relate back to the 10 Commandments, from Exodus 20:1-17, in which God gave the Israelites boundaries to abide by for their protection. Many governmental systems today are based on the 10 Commandments (see "X", pg. 11 by J. John). They are, 1) not to have any gods before our one true God, 2) not to make any graven image to worship, 3) not to take God's name in vain, 4) to remember the Sabbath, and to rest on that day, 5) to honor our parents, 6) not to murder, 7) not to commit adultery, 8) not to steal, 9) not to lie, 10) and not to covet (be jealous of) other people's things.

God set up these boundaries for the Israelites for their protection. God knew that we humans need specific guidelines so that we would not get ourselves into trouble! He knew we needed Him to be #1 in our lives. (Matt 22:37) But, even though these commandments are what we should follow, God is most concerned about the state of our hearts. Our actions are often the fruit of what's in our hearts. But, God wants to have our hearts and for us to know His love - not be separated from Him by religious ritual!

Going to church every single Sunday won't ensure God's blessing on our lives. But, it will provide accountability for the boundaries above. In tithing, we shouldn't give with a motivation to get, but it is a good indicator of whether or not we put God first in our hearts. "Test me in this," says the LORD Almighty, "and see if I will not throw open the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing that there will not be room enough to store it." (Malachi 3:10)

Are you creating a fertile ground in your heart for God's blessing in your life? Ask Him if there are any areas you may need to work on. God wants to bless His children with blessings so great "that there will not be room enough to store it"!

True Financial Freedom

"For the love of money is a root of all kinds of evil, for which some have strayed from the faith in their greediness, and pierced themselves through with many sorrows."  -1 Timothy 6:10

Have you seen anyone destroyed by money? I have.  Have you ever seen someone use money wisely? I've seen that too.  It's difficult to live life without money, but sometimes its presence makes life hard.  How can we make money work for us, instead of us working for it? What are God's purposes for money?

Notice that the above verse doesn’t say that money itself is evil; the love of money is the root of all kinds of evil.  The fruit of someone's heart is often revealed by how and where they spend their money.  Are we spending our money on kingdom building initiatives?  Or are we spending it unwisely?  Are we investing money to grow it?  Or are we throwing it away on bad investments because we lack skill? Are we trusting God with our tithe & giving to the poor?  Or are we hoarding money like the wicked & lazy servant Jesus described?  (Matt 25:26)

God desires that we prosper.  The Bible says it is He who gives us the ability to create wealth.  (Deut 8:18)  When we put God first, the rest of our lives fall into place.  It doesn't mean we don't need skill to make and keep money - we absolutely do.  But how we earn that money, and what we do with that money once we earn it is very important in the eyes of our God. 

Most people are in debt.  Debt has become a cultural norm.  In order to be a people financially free and set apart, we have to think differently about money than most people. In order for us to get out of debt, we need to do different things than people who are in debt! Most people don't understand what money is.  Money is not just the ability to buy things; it is a tool to be used.  Money is not just a way to our wants and desires; it is "seed" for our future, and the future of others. 

Do you want to set yourself apart in the area of money?  Good training in this area is crucial so that God's purposes can be accomplished in our lives, and in the world around us.  Pray that God would make you wise in the area of money.

"But remember the LORD your God, for it is he who gives you the ability to produce wealth, and so confirms his covenant, which he swore to your ancestors, as it is today." -Deuteronomy 8:18

Use Your Gifts!

"Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God's grace in its various forms. If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ." -1 Peter 4:9-11

What is your gift? The Bible calls us to use the gifts that God has given us to serve others and to minister to Him. The Bible also says His gifts and His call are irrevocable. (Romans 11:29) Through the discovery of our gifts, we can bless others through the "various forms of grace" that God has given to us.
 
"...so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us. If your gift is prophesying, then prophesy in accordance with your faith; if it is serving, then serve; if it is teaching, then teach..." -Romans 12:5-7
 
Often we may not know what our gifts are. There are many great self-assessments and tools you can use that will help you discover your gifts and talents. One I have taken is The Call. Sometimes a leader or friend can see your gifts in you. There are many spiritual gifts which include prophecy, teaching, healing, helping, discernment, and miracles, but also "natural" gifts that God has given as well. (See 1 Corinthians 12:27-29)
 
Sometimes, we might be in a place where we're afraid to use our gifts and talents.  Nonetheless, God instructs us to. Sometimes we might think another person has a greater gift than us, so we are ashamed of our gift. But God doesn't feel that way about it. He gave us our gifts for a reason. He had a purpose in mind. There is no hierarchy in gifts, and in order to operate as Christ's body, everything must be working! God will give us grace for the things He's called us to.
 
We should use the gifts God has given us so we can be a blessing to others. But we will also find that when we serve in alignment with the way God has gifted us, we will experience joy as a result, because we are being used by God in the ways that He created us. In this, we discover our purpose to be uniquely used by Him to further His kingdom.
 
Are you using your gifts?